Trying to Remember Not to Forget

He began to suffer migraines, accompanied by worry about everyday things that he had previously found pleasant and average—things taken for granted as easy. Eventually, that anxiety revealed itself as connected to an acute understanding of an approaching precipice: the impermanence of things that were assumed to endure. After days and weeks cocooned in a flat grey existence, now absent of the previous anxiety, something began to penetrate through a point that opened in the background of ambient life. Through that point, he gradually filled with a new self, a fragment of eternity. He now saw himself and others as waves emanating from a distant source far out of view, extending to distant somewheres also far out of view—an endlessness of being reaching past the body after it's been given back to the earth. Slowly, he arose to stand in his new self and walk again in the moment, from which, with each step, the witness faded further away.

-photos by Francis Kanai -modeling and poem by Kan Sano -design by Francis Kanai and ©JOYCE